User:Transporange/Sandbox/Weird Stuff/Escort Flagship

My Escort Flagship is Taihaed, will she sink?

To answer this question completely we must first define our question properly.

What is an Escort Flagship?

Obviously Escort Flagship is the Flagship of an Escort. Again we have met terms that we have not defined.

What is a Flagship?

We quote the first sentence of the corresponding Wikipedia page for your convenience. > A flagship is a vessel used by the commanding officer of a group of naval ships, characteristically a flag officer entitled by custom to fly a distinguishing flag. Therefore, a Flagship is a ship used by the commanding officer of a group of naval ships (in this case likely you, or your proxy), characteristically a flag officer entitled by custom to fly a distinguishing flag. We find a small problem in the definition: you cannot fly a distinguishing flag on any ships in Kancolle. One may reason with ribbons, citing that ribbons are fabrics that is tied to a ship signifying privilege. However, if we look a little bit more closely, we realise two important flaws. Firstly, the object commonly called as "white ribbon" is actually a sash. One does not wear sashes on ships, one wear them on Latin American presidents' shoulders. Secondly, Ribbons are not flags. This is so important I must repeat myself here. Ribbons are not flags. Even if you twist the definition as much as common sense allow, ribbons are never flags. It would also be weird for some ship to hoist a "Sea Colour 'Flag'", for this would just blend into the sea, or a "White 'Flag'", for this would be a bit too Bourbon, and I speak for every reader that we do not want that. Now we realised that the first sentence of the Wikipedia page for Flagship does not helpfully ascertain the definition of a Flagship, we should proceed to the second sentence on the page. > Used more loosely, it is the lead ship in a fleet of vessels, typically the first, largest, fastest, most heavily armed, or best known. Now this definition, although loose, provides a much more quantitative measure towards establishing a good working definition of Flagship. Now the obvious problem is, again, we have multiple definitions that we can choose from. For the case of first ship, we face the problem of choosing what is first. Is it the first ship in the fleet? Is it the first ship in the formation? In the Line Ahead formation, the first ship in the fleet is indeed the first ship in the formation; in the Vanguard formation, the first ship in the formation is actually the fourth ship in the fleet. Is it even possible to reconcile this difference? Moreover, if we use the Line Abreast formation, is there even a "front" ship in the formation? We have found ourselves stuck, and hence we should try other methods. Can we define what a flagship is by largest? Largest in what sense? One may argue that Yamato is the largest, but in fact Jingei is even larger. What happens if you have to put them in the same fleet (this actually happened)? How do we even measure which ship is more well-known? One may say that this most well-known ship is Bismarck, but right now perhaps more people know Kaga than any other German ship. One may say that the criteria of most heavily armed is the best. Is Nagato more heavily armed because she has two guns, or is Yahagi more heavily armed because she has three torpedoes? Or is it Myoukou with 3 guns? One may even argue both Nagato and Yahagi are his fłagships. Turns out these measuring criteria is hard to be used, although deceptively looking easy! Alas, we have come to a huge dead end, and hence we have reached the end of the first paragraph of the Wikipedia page for Flagship... Wait what? We have reached the end of the first paragraph of the Wikipedia page for Flagship? It is a huge achievement for me, and for you! To have read so far into this essay on Flagships! However, we don't even have a working definition for the term Flagship yet. We must turn to our final yet forbidden source of definition.

Our Lord and Saviour, infallible, almighty. Tanaka. According to Tanaka, the definition of Flagship is FleetShips[0]. Now, what is the 0th ship? Can we even count from zero? What is zero?

Well zero is the number of people that have read this essay from start up to this point. You may wonder, how is it even possible? The number zero is not even natural, how do you use such numbers to describe natural objects like human? (We unfortunately do not have time to delve into the definition of natural numbers, or if humans are natural.) Fortunately, without investigating the philosophical side of our topic, we can again resort to computer science to resolve our paradox. If you ask a programmer how many people live in his apartment (*), he will answer you 0. The reason behind this is straightforward, programmers are made of Maths major who didn't do too well in their final exams, which means they start counting from 0. I understand this can be a bit too overwhelming for non-Maths majors, seeing that most of us starts counting from 1. We still don't know why this is the case, although I am told that every programmer that has answered 1 in the question (*) has been burnt alive. I assume this is the core reason for programmers to not start counting with 1, they are naturally afraid of being burnt alive. Therefore, we may now convincingly conclude that the Flagship refers to the first ship of the fleet.

What is an Escort?

We once again try to quote Wikipedia as our main reference, however there is no page for Escort, and everything it tries to link to are related to topics unsuitable for immature audiences. We sadly must again consult Tanaka for the definition: Fleet 2. However we must emphasize, Tanaka does not count from 0, praise to him. So indeed the Fleet 2 is the Second fleet you see on your Composition page, where the fleet where the number 2 is is.

Finally we have answered our first question, what is an Escort Flagship? An Escort Flagship is the First ship in Fleet 2.

Will she sink?

No.